A brief conversation
Posted on Wed Dec 20th, 2017 @ 9:08pm by Captain Jamie T. Kirk
Location: Captain's dining room
After the meeting, and seeing to the bridge, Kirk left as Beta shift came on. Now, sitting in the Captain's dining room, she sat alone and chewed her food slowly while watching the stars streak by outside her window. Absentmindedly she stirred her food around on her plate, not really hungry but knowing she had to eat. Picking up her glass of Merlot she sipped it, then set it back down and leaned back in relaxation as she had been doing since coming in here. She had heard, ofrten times, that being the CO of a starship was a lonely existance, that not many could sit with her as a friend without the title and position getting in the way. And now, having experienced the bias about age and inexperience, she now knew what that all had meant. What Captain, if any, was completely ready when given their first command? None, from what she was told. They all made mistakes, got questioned, and were watched. The better CO's were able to improvise, overcome and adapt to save their ship and crew. Jamie could give a damn about Sovereign, but the crew would always be her first priority, even if she would have to order a subordinate to do something she knew would get them killed to save the rest. It would pain her greatly, but the loss of one, over all, was an acceptable alternative.
Sighing, Kirk pushed her plate away and took up her glass, sipping here and there while lost in thought.
A female voice broke through her thoughts. "Are you feelin' fine, Miss Jamie?"
Kirk blinked her eyes a few times, to break the reverie, looking up at her chef, Ellinore Olovsdotter. Or, Elli, as she liked to be called. Blonde hair, blue eyes and distinctly Scandinavian, despite her Jamaican accent. "I'm fine, Elli, thank you. Just a lot on my mind."
"Stop the wine and go whiskey, girl. Much better for mood swings."
Jamie gave a light chuckle and smile. "No thanks. That would certainly bring the mood to a whole new level of angry."
Elli motioned to another chair, sitting when Kirk nodded for her to go ahead. She clasped her hands together on the surface. "Captain, you need to take control. You allow others to choose your path. YOU decide what is right and wrong as the commanding officer, not them."
Kirk swallowed down the last bit of wine in her glass, then set it down. "I get that, Elli. It's not that easy. I see them scrutinizing me as a cadet, not a CO."
Elli shrugged and sat back. "It is that easy, Jamie. You told me yourself that Captain Kahn had given you the promotion to LT.jg, as soon as you arrived. That negates any reference to cadet."
"Again," said Kirk. "It's not that easy. With a starship crew they need to trust me as much as I trust them. Things are askew and I don't blame them for how they feel. At the same time, I can't let it interfere with my command decisions."
"Then don't, said Elli, shrugging again. "If they can't get in line, according to Starfleet regulations, then that is on them. It is your duty to see to that, to correct it. I have served a few Captains in my time, and all of them go through this same turmoil. But, when they finally decided to end it they did it with a spine, and an iron fist. Don't let them run roughshod over you."
Jamie looked at her Chef, seeing the youthful face, backed by those wise eyes. "Did you ever serve?"
"Oh no," said Elli, standing with a smile and pushing her chair back in and then gathering the dirty crockery. "This is not the Elli question, answer hour. This is about you. I reserve the right to not answer that question until a later date."
Jamie giggled. "Mysterious, and a great chef. I will keep my eye on you."
Elli stopped collecting items a moment, putting a hand on Kirk's right shoulder and squeezing gently. "Miss Jamie, just be you. That's all you need. Anything else is a false front." Gathering her stack of crockery, Elli put it in a busser tub and walked out of the dining area.
Kirk remained seated, Elli bringing her another glass of wine. As she sipped it her eyes went back to the streaking stars. "Computer, reduce lighting fifty percent." The illumination in the room dropped by half, except for control panels, making it more comfortable for inner thoughts.